18 & Married

18 and Married .

Some people say it's too early .Some doubt if I can make it .Some ask why am I not enjoying to the fullest .Some ,most to be honest ,have  no confident that I'll make it .It's sad that we are living in a society now that love no longer matter ,the first question direct to the man is a straight " How much dowry are you giving her   ?"

Yes ,I am married at 18 and no ,I'm not marrying because of whatever reason the society has to say . Shotgun ,force ,pregnant ,jobless whatever reasons you can call of .I got married because I want to .Not force or any pessimism people can have . I am 18 ,working as a Document Control and yes ,I'm more than happy to tell the world of my love story .

Jaka Aryandas.

His name .We were together ever since I was sentenced to a hostel at Kovan . I guess everyone has their rebel days & perhaps ,it's just that I started early . Pertapis wasn't an easy place to live at . With 60-70 girls in a house ,Allah knows how many emotional crying mad friends i have.There were curfews for everything .Eat,sleep,school ,work and even Homeleave, Like usual ,I'm always putting myself to trouble . Going back late . Arguing .Lying .Etc.

I met him at this period of my life . Never have i thought that i was ever going to be serious with him . A plain cute gentleman that has no idea who i truly am ,all I wanted was someone to ' pass time ' .I remember how much we had fun . Of course the advices to change doesn't knock into my head.Only until ....... We fought and I lose him .Only then I realize that I have started to love him .

The journey to change over a new leaf wasn't as easy as to say .Despite the stormy days and the emotional moments ,he stayed through my bad times . I guess all the Cheatings and lies and break ups are inevitable .We started early ,we love and just like other couple do ,we argue and fight .It was really a hard time back then .Surviving for months not meeting your love one .Being inside and not knowing what his doing , who was he with .All the insufficient trust makes it worst . I got into depression .An illness which I guess by now everyone knows what it is: Bipolar. Going inside the hospital in and out ,Afterall ,he was the man that came and took care of me .The one that makes me smile with his jokes while I was sick .

''Its okay baby .A few more months to go"

We sat down after months of quarelling,agreeing to the fact that we do still love each other . Planning on engagement ,marrying was still not on our list ...Well ,not yet. We survived only a few months of engagement ,until it tested both of ourself to its limit .From school to work to financial to FAMILY .I remembered very well how I saw tears in his eyes ,trying so much to work things out .He still don't wanna let go .At the time I was discharge ,I remembered how he promise that the outside world won't be alien to me anymore .We went for datings and activities together.

I guess ,his the only one who knows how much rides we have went through .It is sad to see everyone quarrelling  and families got seperated .I remembered so much pain we both encounter during the argument we had with my family .How can he takecare of her ? How can he afford to give her food ? Blah blah auntie story .A promise of w 2 years engagement was cut to only 10 months.We took the risk of course ,to let marriage settles the whole thing . It wasn't easy as I say .How much we can cry over the challenges that are pinning down on us .

''It's okay .Allah is there " 

Believing in The One have never been wrong . We took step by step in enduring and here we are today,proudly to be called as Husband and Wife .Perhaps ,it is too early .But it was never a regret nor a mistake .I am happy and still are enjoying .Just that maybe ,I don't have to worry going to club and getting myself touched by other boys .I don't have to  think of going overseas alone .I don't have to think of waking up with different boys day by day ,week by week and month by month . I don't have to be afraid of anyone that will come in my life,sweetalking and leave me out of sudden.I'm loved by a person that have vowed to stick thru me till the day I shut my eyes for permanent .I am cared to the person that have promised to keep me safe and love me for who i truly am .

''Indahnya semua apabila Halal'' .